June 4th, 2012

Whooh!  What a weekend.
Boyfriend and i went to Beaufort (SC) to see my Mom.
It's been awhile since i was there last...
And once again, i was rudely reminded why that is.


We don't really like her husband.
He is so opinionated!  And he's never wrong.  And even when you try to agree with him, YOU'RE STILL WRONG!
It's a bit like the Harley saying, "If i have to explain it, you won't understand!"
If you haven't been with this man, there really isn't a way for me to explain and describe how and why he is SO difficult to try to get along with!!!


I try to bring my Yoga "off the mat", as they say.
I TRY to overlook his habits...
I try to remind myself that, inside he's just a hurt little boy...
I try to ignore the "bad", and only look at the "good"...


But DAMN!!!  
When i went there at X'mas and New Year's to take care of them from their hospital stays, it was so rough.  And when i finally came back home, i told Boyfriend that i felt as if i'd been physically and mentally abused! 
This time isn't quite that bad (and i assume that's because i didn't stay as long), but it's still... such an ORDEAL!  
And it makes me not want to go back.


I know that's awful of me!
So many people simply WISH they could visit their Moms for just ONE HOUR, but they can't because their Moms have already passed away.
And if you are one of those people, and my incessant *whining* is bugging the hell out of you?
I sincerely apologize!




Okay!
My day today was good!  =-)
I think I'll wait 'til tomorrow to tell you about it.






I hope you're having a Lovely Day!!!
=-)

May 30th, '12

Boyfriend and i are busy with plans for the backyard.
He's decided he really wants to do some "re-work" back there.


So i've been moving dirt and plants from that area, 'cause it's gonna be totally changed!


Also
Last Tuesday (the day after Memorial Day) was a kinda busy day for me.
First, i transplanted a bunch of my irises; some into the front yard, not far from the front door; some to the back left corner, by the fence.  [Weekend before  last, Boyfriend and i moved 3 Clematis plants, and about 15 Asiatic Lilies.  We put them in the "new" area up against the fence.  They already look great!  =-)  (I was so afraid that moving the Lilies would kill them, but they actually survived!)]


I also did some sewing.  My little sister, Z, brought a friend, Nikki, over on Sunday evening (May 27th) and asked me if i could fix a couple of Nikki's dresses.
Huh?  I haven't seen Z since the day before Daddy left, and all of a sudden she zips in and wants me to do something for her friend...
Okay.  Whatever.  (At least she knows i'm here for her.)


Anyway, i did a repair on one dress (sewed elastic back in around the top), and "tightened up" the straps on another dress.  It was kinda funny because, with Monday being a holiday, i kept thinking that Monday was actually Sunday, so Tuesday kept feeling like Monday to me!  Nikki "needed" one of those dresses on Tuesday 'cause she was going on a date, so when it suddenly struck me that morning that, "Oh Crap! It's TUESDAY!!!", i had to jump-on-it!
Whatever.  It got me goin', anyway.  =-)
While i was at my sewing machine, i also repaired Bunny's purse that's been sitting there for a few MONTHS waiting for me to fix it.
And i "darned" the hole in my jeans that's been slowly getting bigger.


So THAT felt good!  To get all that stuff accomplished, and to be in front of my  sewing machine again.  It made me feel like "the Old Me".  =-)


I also made supper!  Boyfriend & i went on the Atkins diet in March of 2011, and have been on it since then, and something about it...  I dunno.  I just have been on a downward spiral about getting in the kitchen and actually cooking.


And now?  Now we're switching from Atkins to Ayurveda.
What?  You've never heard of Ayurveda?  It's merely the oldest medicine there is. It's a holistic way of living that's over 5,000 years old, and it's from India.  Deepak Chopra has a site about it.  And this is an AWESOME book about it, including recipes!
Anyway, i diverge...  I've been reading about Ayurveda, and trying to memorize my "Allowed" and "Not Allowed" foods, AND Boyfriend's "Allowed" & "Not Allowed" foods, and so i'm having a difficult time with trying to figure out WHAT to cook!
But Tuesday, i cooked!  And it felt GOOD.  
Again, feeling more like "the Old Me".  =-)


It was a good day!
I hope you're having a good day, too!


=-)

What A Journey!

I apologize for not posting in such a long time, but...
Well?  Honestly?

I've discovered that FaceBook is a Vortex-Black Hole!

I'll get on my computer to write a post, 

or to look at some blogs,

or to write something on Word,

or whatever...

And next thing i know,

it's TWO HOURS LATER!

And i've accomplished NOTHING!

Except i've been "entertained" on FaceBook!

I haven't done the laundry;

i haven't done the ironing;

i haven't done the dishes;

i haven't even made the bed yet!

But i've "caught up" with all my friends on FB, buddy!

So i may try to do an "Intervention" on myself.  

I'm gonna try a little "rehab" for awhile.  =-)

Ha ha.

...

Anyway!

I came on here today to give you an update!

I'm SO EXCITED!!!

On Sunday, May 20th, 2012, 

I GRADUATED FROM 

YOGA TEACHER TRAINING!!!

I graduated with a certificate for 200-hour Vinyasa Flow Yoga.

Now i've sent in my certificate (a copy) and money to Register with Yoga Alliance, so soon (2 - 3 weeks?) i'll be a

Registered Yoga Teacher!

and i can put the initials RYT behind my name (for at least 3 years).  =-)

Not really sure if i should post this picture, but...

It's mine, and i'm in it, and i'm SO PROUD of it!!!  

My Graduating Class (& my 2 Teachers!)

(I'm the 3rd from the left in the back)

It was *quite* a Journey!

I learned so much about Myself.

I learned so much about People.

I learned so much about Yoga.

I learned SO MUCH!

It was an AWESOME Experience!  =-)

...and now i'd best go make the bed.

AND fix supper!

Namaste, ya'll!!!   =-)

I Just Don't *Feel* Like It...

I *want* to post a blog at least once a week...


I just don't *feel* like it.




I *want* to go paint in my room...


I just don't *feel* like it.




I *want* to go hang out with friends...


I just don't *feel* like it.




I *want* to go for a walk out in this gorgeous weather...


I just don't *feel* like it.




I *want* to go sew something...


I just don't *feel* like it.




...i've been down in the dumps for a couple of weeks.  Sorry i haven't posted anything lately.  I *want* to...  I just can't muster up the motivation.   


Hopefully i'll start "feeling like it" again soon.


I hope your part of the World is going good.
=-)

Happy Birthday

Today is Boyfriend's birthday.


I always call him "Boyfriend" on here, but that's just because of the 'anonymity'  thing 'we' all try to maintain on blogs.


In actuality, i've been married to this *very* wonderful man for over 28 years!


It's kinda hard to believe that someone could love me as completely and as forgiving-ly  as this man has... AND for more than TWENTY-EIGHT YEARS!!!!!


That's really hard to believe.


But even harder to believe is how MUCH he loves me.
How much he SHOWS me he loves me.
How, after all these years, he's still excited to see me.
...and i don't just mean when i'm naked.
...though, after ALL these years, i'm NOT as young and "nubile" as i once was, and yet... he's STILL excited to see me... even though my skin is starting to sag... and my hair is *definitely* getting grey... and my "girls" are definitely NOT what they once were... and allllllll the aging i've been doing lately...


...wow...
i'm starting to depress myself now...




But my point was!  He's STILL EXCITED!
And i am SO THANKFUL!!!


Thank you, Herman, for being in my life.
Thank you for staying with me through it alllll.
Thank you for loving me.  For putting up with my shit.  For "overlooking" sooooo much.  For being patient.  For adapting.  For listening... ESPECIALLY for listening when i don't/won't talk!!!


I cannot thank you enough for all the things you do, and for the person you are, and for the ways you love me.
I do NOT know what i would do if something happened to you!


And i hope i don't find out.
I would curl up into a tight little ball and cry myself to sleep for a looong time.  






Happy Birthday to the Man who may not be Perfect
but who's Perfect FOR ME!!!

August, 1983

March, 2011

(Herman's B'day @ Chima's)

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!!!

...and here's to 28 MORE!!!  (*IF* you can take it!)  

=-)

If Not Now... When?

(photo by Bunny)

"Everything changed the day she figured out there was exactly enough time for the important things in her life."


- Brian Andreas




I hope your week is lovely.
=-)

...Awful...

So i've been awful...
An awful Blogger, anyway.


It's not my intention!  Honest.  
But if there isn't much going on in my life, other than the typical "same ol', same ol'"...
Well...
Then i just can't force myself to blog anything.


I always feel like i can't make a blog post if i don't have any news...
or some new project i'm working on...
or something going on that "bears telling".


I'm slowly working on some embroidery on a bluejean jacket...  Still.  =-)
I'm also slowly doodling and what-not on an "altered" book.  I've been doing "something" with this book for, what, like 3 years now? 
Not 3 years steadily, though!  Like 10 minutes one day here, and then 12 minutes one day like 6 months from now.  It sits around a lot.


But that's how i "work".


But i AM working on getting my Yoga Teacher Training!  =-)
And it's KICKIN' MY ASS!!!
The first weekend, i was on my period, so i came home absolutely *exhausted* each day (it's fri, sat & sun).
But then, the second weekend, i wasn't on, so it went better.
Then this past weekend, i was on it again, so i'm *still* tired/not right.
But i'm hoping tomorrow is better... motivation-wise, anyway.  =-)




...oh.  Oh yeah.
I have some sad news to share...
Kitty will be moving out soon.
She wants to move out soon with her boyfriend.  Like, maybe next month.


I
Am 
Totally
NOT
Ready
For
This!
!
!


But i know it's just the natural progression of things as they should be.
She's growing up.
I'm happy that she has the confidence to move out.
I'm happy that she has the courage.


But now...?
Now i'll be...


Alone.


I know Boyfriend is still here!  I'm not saying that!
But he's usually at work, and i'm usually here...
By myself.
Just me and the dog.
And she's usually 


asleep.






But i'll be fine.
I know i will.


I just need some time to digest this.




I'll be back.
I don't know when!
But i'll BE BACK!!!


=-)

...I'm Terrible, I Know. Sorry.

I apologize for it being such a looong time since i last posted.
It's not that i don't think about posting.  I do!
It's just that i don't always have much of anything to post about.
I just go about my days, doing my "usual" things, and i don't think you want to read the same things, week after week...


Or maybe i'm wrong.
You know, all of those "reality" shows are so popular now, and most of them are about all the day-to-day and stupid things that folk do.
So maybe i have the wrong attitude about it all.  =-)


Anyway, my Dad is still coming over every weekday for his Yoga class from me. =-)  I'm so thrilled that he's doing Yoga!  


And he's noticing improvements!!!
That's the really important and wonderful thing!  (in case you couldn't figure that one out for yourself)  =-)


Anyway, he comes over every weekday.  We used to do his "class" after my  own morning Yoga class, but we decided to change it.
It was kinda an out-of-sorts time when we were doing his Yoga at lunchtime.  So yesterday (Monday), we started doing his Yoga at 7:45am.
It's working out much better.  =-)




...and speaking of Yoga...
My Yoga Teacher Training starts THIS Friday!!!
I'm excited, but i'm also nervous.  When i told my teacher that i was also nervous, she just didn't understand *why* i would be nervous...
Seriously?!
I worry about so many things.
Of course i would be worried about this too.


But i'm gonna do it, regardless of my worries or fears.
I *am* looking forward to it.


I'll try to keep you posted.
(... but hopefully it w


Wish me luck!


=-)

I Know, I Know...

What can i say: I'm a Slacker!


I'm not *exactly* a Slacker, though.  I *have* been busy.
Plus the Sun hasn't shone around here for a few days, so i haven't been able to take any pictures of my latest Painting, so i haven't had a whole lot of desire to post...


Okay, okay!  So i'm *not* a Slacker...


I'm a Procrastinator!   [rolling eyes] Whatever.


Anyway!
The Sun finally decided to shine today, so i got my busy butt out there and took photos of my latest Painting!  Yay!   Go Me!  =-)


I'm sort of proud of this one. 
I  know when you see it, you're gonna think it's a religious Icon, or a Saint, or something similar, but, honestly it's NOT!


...
Wait.  
Let me start from the beginning, which is actually a very good place to begin.


I took an online painting course from Connie that lasted 6 weeks, and i discovered that i ABSOLUTELY LOVE painting!  Her course is about the Process, and not about the Product (the outcome, the actual picture). 
(If you're at all interested, she has a FREE course you can try first to see if you might like her paid course;  Total Alignment.  LOVED it!   Then took a paid course;  BIG.  LOVED IT too!)


Anyway, i took her free course and then took a paid course, and then...
The course ended, as all things much, eventually.


So then i had a decision to make.
Do i wait and take another course with Connie, 
or do i try to decide what to paint...  On My Own?!?!


Well, her next course didn't start until January (this was back in November), and i honestly didn't want to wait that long. 
I wanted to paint, 
and i wanted to paint *now*!


But then i had another decision to make:
...
...what do i paint *about*?!?


Well.
Last month, i got to thinking about "what do i paint about now", and i decided to touch on the subject that i discovered while still in the beginning of the BIG course:
Why do i hold back?
Why do i deny myself so much, and worry so much?
WHY DO I HOLD BACK?!?!


So *that's* what i painted about.


"Why Do I Hold Back?"


It felt good while i was painting.
I thought about the fact that i've been "holding back" all my life.
I thought about how "holding back" stems from Worry.
I thought about lots of things while i was painting, but i didn't allow myself to think about whether my painting "looked right", or whether it was "good".
I Just Painted.
I painted what "felt right", and what felt good.
I talked out loud to myself while i was painting.
I asked myself questions that i didn't *need* to answer at that time.


I talked to myself A LOT while i painted this one.
And if felt Right.
It felt Good.


I didn't come up with any "answers" during this painting time, but at least i was asking myself the "right" questions.  =-)


I *know* they were the right questions, because they "painted out".
(Don't ask me to explain that one; i'm not really sure how to answer it.  I just know in my Heart that what i was doing was Right and Good.)  =-)


Sorry.  I've had coffee, so i tend to yak a lot when i've had coffee.
Without further "ado", here's


"Holding Back & Worry"  (Dec. 2011)

I know it's difficult to tell without anything to "scale"  it, but

it's about 3' wide x 5' tall.

And sorry about the shadows too!

Here's another shot where i moved the Painting a bit 

to effectively "move" the shadows...

I "warned" you before that she looks kinda like a religious Icon or Saint or somemthing.  That was NOT my intention when i was painting it!
NOPE!
I was just "painting what i felt"!
Painting without questioning "why".
Painting that which felt "Right".


...did i mention that i don't like her eyes?
I think they're "fuxxed up"!
But that's not my problem!
That is what "came out", so that's what's there.


...and that's really why i'm not posting any close-ups of this one.
I don't want you to nit-pick either.
It is what it is.




...and i like it.
Now, don't get me wrong!  If i sit around and "analyze" it, then i can see EVERY LITTLE IMPERFECTION!
But that's not the point in Connie's painting courses!
The point is
to paint!
And so that's what i did.


=-)


I hope you're having a marvelous day!


...and if you're not?
Well, then, you'd better turn around!
Lift your head up and LAUGH OUT LOUD!
That always makes me feel a little bit better,
even when i'm in one of my Dark Places.


It's another glorious day!
And you've been given the miracle and blessing of Being a Part of It!!!
=-)


Take care!




=-)

Well... Finally!

I thought, since it's a New Year... a "new beginning"... that today would be a good day to finally post about my Beaded Cuff.

I've been working on it, off and on, for a *while* now.  =-)

Don't ask me how long it took to bead it...  I really don't know. 

I don't keep up with that kind of thing when i'm on a project.

My husband would be good at that type of thing, though.

...but i didn't ask him at the beginning of this project, to do that for me, so...

Sorry.  Just suffice to say that it took 

"a while".  =-)

Part of the reason for that is that there were plenty of times where the cuff simply *sat* on my desk... waiting...  

Waiting for me to pick it up again.

Then, there were those times when i worked on it for *hours* at a time:

boring days,

and most especially on those 4-hour rides to Beaufort, SC to see my Mom.

*Lots* of productive time then!

Before i let you see it (assuming you haven't already scrolled down of your own accord!) please allow me to babble a bit.  =-)

I don't remember how i got the idea for this thing, but once i did, i just *had* to make it.  =-)

I have some crushed velvet in my stash that i've had for a looong time.  

I don't even remember where it came from, or how long i've had it.  I *think* i got it when i used to make purses/bags.  

Anyway.

I got the idea to use up some of these beads i have lying around in my cabinet.  

(I've had them a long time too.  I've always wanted to do something with them, but never knew *what*...) 

Anyway.

I decided i wanted to make me a beaded cuff on that velvet.

(I guess i must tell you that it's not *really* velvet... but i don't know what it is, so... it's "velvet", okay?)

I originally thought i'd use a Coke can as the "underbelly"... the "base"... the "stabilizer" for the cuff,but as i went on with the project, i found out i didn't really wanna do it that way.

Okay.

Pause.

Rewind.

Rethink.

Pause some more.

Talk to friends about "what to do", "what to do".

My friend Pat (from the Y) suggested what i should use to "stiffen" up the "innards" like i was thinking i should.  I forget what the stuff is called, but it was BRIGHT yellow.  I mean brighter than Highlighter Yellow!  And it was kinda canvas-like, and kinda hole-y.  I dunno what it was, but it was some Embroidery or Crewel material that's a bit stiff.

Bingo!

Thanks Pat!  =-)

And, Yes.

I individually hand-sewed *each* and *every* bead onto the "velvet".

Yes. It took a long time.

It took a very long time.

BUT!

I enjoyed it.

For some people, it would drive them batty.

But for me, i truly enjoyed it.  

It's a time to slow down.

A time to think about other things.

A time to relax into a soothing rhythm of string bead, poke needle, pull thread, tie knot, poke needle, pull thread.  Repeat.

Soothing.

For someone like me, anyway.  =-)

And once i finally completed the beading, it was so wonderful!

Satisfying that i accomplished such a "daunting" task; a project i've never really tried before.   

And this is something that's "All Me"!

I didn't have any type of "pattern".

No Tutorial or Instructions from anyone else.

No Pattern whatsoever!

This one is "All Me", Baby!  =-)

So, please enjoy!   =-)

Wendy's Beaded Cuff in the late afternoon Sun

But... See that little "string" up there?

On the upper Left?

...Yeah.

That's where a bead has already been broken off!

Can you believe it?!  I've only worn it like 3 or 4 times, and

i've already *broken* it!

I think i can fix it, though.

And i'm STILL wearing it!

ONE little broke-off bead is NOT gonna make me STOP wearing it!

I love it too much.

=-)

Yep.  There's that little "string"...

Taunting me again

"Nah-nah, nah-nah, nah!" and sticking its tongue out at me.

Well, i'm STILL wearing it, so

THERE!

Hmph!

 Why, yes, it *does* close with Snaps!    (I  originally thought about Velcro, but changed my mind)

 See?!  Those *are* Snaps.  =-)

 And the Inside shot...

 The Centerfold Shot  =-)

(Does this count as "Porn"?)

I've "busted" a bead off of it already!
I'll have to see if i can fix that before any more come off!

But i  love it anyway!  =-)

So, i hope you've enjoyed this post!
I'm pretty proud of my Beaded Cuff (if you couldn't already tell).  =-)
And it goes with pretty much *everything*
which is always a Bonus.  =-)


And the truly flattering part?
My little sister, Z?
The *really* *picky* sister?
She LOVES it and wants me to make one for her!!!  (Just not quite so wide...)


(And i take that as *quite* the Compliment!)


I hope you're having a Super Fantastic Wonderful Day!!!


And
by the way


HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!


=-)